Sunday, November 23, 2008

Sorority

I never belonged to a sorority. I wasn't a traditional college student - I worked full-time, went to school at night, and lived at home with the parents and commuted to a local University. I don't necessarily dislike sororities, but I never pictured myself being the sorority-type.

This past week, I was telling Jason about conversations I've been having with women since I found out I was pregnant. All the mother's of the kids at school I work for suddenly have so much to say and share with me regarding pregnancy and kids...it's pleasant, but almost alarming. Jason told me it was as if I was rushing a sorority. I am in the pledge class ("pregnant"), my hazing ("labor & Delivery") will determine my being invited in, and then I will be a member ("mother").....My hubby has always been good with analogies, but this is by far, one of his best.

While I am excited to enter the Mommy Sorority, I am also sad that I am leaving behind my prior designation. My friends who are single and/or married w/out kids will of course remain my friends, but the environment I am moving into is inherently different. Much like how a sorority/fraternity separates you from other classmates and prior friends, so does parenthood.

I don't know that its the same for men...in fact, I'm fairly certain that its not. I am determined to not let motherhood consume me to the point where I am ONLY a mother. I need my friends and family to remind me of the Rebecca I was before the baby came: wife, daughter, sister, friend, feminist, sassy-pants, etc. So if you talk to me and all I can converse about it little peanut's spit-up, the color of peanut's poop, and how exhausted I am, please stop me and say, "can we talk about something else". I will try to remember not to take it personally, but rather appreciate your attempt to remind me that being a mother is more than baby's bodily fluids - it's about being the woman you always were and bringing baby along for the ride!

1 comment:

inprogress said...

Don't you worry, I'll deflect any and all conversations that lead to you telling me about baby spit-ups and poop!